Chess.com My user name is hptchess

I have not posted pictures in a while due to computer issues. My new computer is on its way to HP for advanced repair.

I have found found a site to play chess on line. It is chess.com Log on and look me up. My user ID is hptchess.

I will post pictures again. Mickey sent some and I was going to post some but I don't want to spend a lot of time working on a comperter that may be near death.

This is a punny post...

Look for the challenge question in P. 119

Here is an interesting Sutton website. Don't know if they are connected to us. I looked around a little and then needed to get back to work so I am posting it for you to enjoy.

http://www.suttonfamilyhome.net/

::::::> Punny Part:

*Message left on an answering machine: Don't panic but I'm in hospital. I have poisoned myself. I ate what I thought was an onion. Turned out it was a daffodil bulb. Doctor says I'll be out in the spring!

*I asked my mailman why my letters were all wet…he said "postage dew".

*I know some people can tell time by the sun, but I have never been able to make out the numbers.

Ø If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
Ø Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
Ø If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

P.121 Pushing the envelope!

When I was young I dreamed of being a test pilot. Flying
higher, faster, farther. Risking my life for the science of
aviation. But when I grew up I found out I wasn't qualified
because of my poor eyesight. Now I work in a post office
which gives me many of the same thrills.

I'm always pushing the envelope!

P.120 Red, white and together

* A plateau is a high form of flattery.

* Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

* When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

*A man entered the local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different entries, hoping that at least one of them would win. Unfortunately, NO PUN IN TEN DID. :)

P.119 PIPE DOWN out there!

* We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.

* The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it.

* The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground

P.117 Yellow, I say.

The math teacher was hungry, but all she had to eat was a piece of pi.

Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.

P.116 Red, I said. (and math teacher puns)

Math teachers have lots of answers.
He became a math teacher due to some prime factors.
We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.

P.115 It's time. Let's Roll. (or, Have Pun. Will Travel.)

When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.

The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

P.114 Making the world a better place:

Making the world a better place: commit random acts of comedy.. Partial video title by Michael Pritchard

P.113 Coming through

l

Why is everyone so cranky?: Life is not a duress rehearsal. Video title by Leaslie Charles

P.112 Step aside. Color coordinated creation coming through!

"A smile is contagious; be a carrier."

P.111 Fashon is my game.

Featured Illustration items are well suited for introducing or illuminating a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Old Jeb is the laziest man in the county. One day his best friend drove by his farm and noticed his barn was on fire. "Your barn's burning down," he yelled.
"I know it," replied Jeb.
"Well, ain't ya gonna do somethin'?" asked the friend.
"Do somethin'?" responded Jeb. "'Bout what?"
"Why about puttin' out the fire, ya durn fool." answered the friend.
"I am doin' somethin'." replied Jeb.
"What the heck are you doin', jist sittin' there 'n all?" asked Jeb's friend.
"I ain't jist sittin'," replied Jeb, "I'm sittin' here prayin' for rain."

P.110 I have fingers growing from my head. I think you do too.

In a software design meeting, we were using typical technical jargon to discuss a data exchange interface with a vendor. One co-worker said the programming we had ordered was delayed because the vendor was suffering from a "severe nonlinear waterfowl issue."
Curious, the team leader raised his eyebrows and asked, "What exactly is that?"

The programmer replied, "They don't have all their ducks in a row."

P.109 She was the flying queen....

* A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
* A thief fell and broke his leg in wet cement. He became a hardened criminal.
* Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking.

P.108 Fast and green....

P.107 Time Warp! See me warping throught 2007.

A pun a day helps me become a better humor being
Two cannon balls got married and had BBs.

P.106 I am bright and on the move!

Making the world a better place: commit random acts of comedy.. Partial video title by Michael Pritchard

P.105 Staffing the check-in area

She said, "To write with a broken pencil is pointless."

P.104 Say....

I love having my picture taken!
***Here is a challenge for you: Who..... is getting their picture taken? I have you this time: no shoes, shirts.. nothing. Ha!

P.103 Lunch